Your options, after printing:
Home Archives Contact Us
Subscribe Community Current Issue
   Managing

Managing The Difficult Boss
Finding Ways To Help Them Lead


    Some of us have to work for managers, supervisors and clients who are difficult, inept, or just plain bad.  On the other hand, some of us only think we do.  How do you know, and what do you do?

    These problems are exacerbated when you don't work in the same place as the person (whom we'll call "the boss" here) with whom you're having difficulties.  At least when you're face-to-face, you've got lots of informative behavior to observe:  Do others get along with the boss?  Does the boss treat you the same way as others?

    It's especially tough when your difficult boss doesn't share your experience of working outside the office.  If the boss doesn't understand what its like to work at the other end of the phone line, out on the edge of the Internet "cloud," how can he (or she) be an effective manager of your productivity?


The Boss' Job

    The manager or supervisor to whom you report isn't automatically a superior, or better person:  They just have a different kind of job.  In most cases, they've been given their assignment because somebody decided they could do it well.  You and your peers may be doing a particular kind of task every day, but it's your boss' responsibility to see that you're doing the right things, in the approved way, and that you have adequate resources to be productive.

    Put another way:  Your boss' job isn't to control you, but to guide you and your peers to the best possible work that helps the whole organization fulfill it's purpose.  A good boss coaches you, notices when you've done well, and motivates you to do even better.  
Experienced managers often joke:  "Hire 'm young, while they still know everything!"

It's their way of cheerfully accepting that some employees may not yet have enough experience to know things may be 


    The boss' job is different from yours.  Some bosses know how to do that job better than others, and most are still improving...but your difficult boss might be the exception.  If you've never been a boss yourself, never been responsible for the productivity of others who may have less experience, you may not appreciate how tough that job can be.


Performing Triage
    The first thing you have to evaluate is whether you're working for a bad boss or someone who's experience drives them to look at the world differently from you.  By the very nature of corporate organization, managers and supervisors have different responsibilities and interests from you.  Your first challenge is to figure out whether your dissatisfaction is due to your own lack of experience.  
Triage means sorting things into categories.

The most popular use of the term is in military field hospitals, where the "triage officer" has the tough job of sorting casualties into three groups:
1) Those who'll survive without immediate care,
2) Those for whom care would be futile, and
3) Those who survival depends on immediate
      medical attention.


Sorting Perception From Reality

    You're unhappy.  You're so sure your boss "doesn't have a clue," or is "impossible to work for," or "utterly incompetent."  Not only that, your peers agree and you all grouse about it together.  You may be right, but before you make a dramatic "career-limiting move," make sure you have all the facts.

    Sometimes, there's just a personality clash:  You may find that you're not productive working for one person, but you'd be immensely productive working for another.  Be sure it's your boss that's the problem, though:  If you've worked for three bad bosses in a row, you might need to look within to discover the one thing in common to all three experiences:  You.

    Once you've decided you have a problem with your boss, spend some time—on the order of a few weeks—to gather enough data to make informed decisions.  You need to decide whether that "difficult boss" is really the source of the problem.  Based on what you find out, you can choose your best course of action.

    The best first step is to perform triage:  Sort what you observe into several categories, so you can decide the real situation.  You may need help here, because the boss may have lots more experience than you, and might actually be performing in accordance with generally acceptable practices used in this organization.  If your boss behaves unethically, for instance, and you discover other managers in the organization doing the same, it may be that the organization's ethical culture is simply incompatible with your own sense of "what's right."

    A good first start is to discover how your boss fits into these three categories:

The boss is smarter than you think, and he's consistently behaving within the rules and customs of your organization, or

The boss is a total jerk and operates from values that are harmful to you, to others, and to the organization as a whole, or

The boss has been promoted to the job without adequate preparation, and needs help in becoming a better leader.


The Boss May Be Smarter Than You Think

    If this possibility is hard to believe, you probably have to work hard to decide whether it's true.  You may have to investigate and gather data from other people you trust.  This is a good time to leverage your relationship with a mentor.  A mentor is someone who's higher than you in the hierarchy, to whom you don't report, and who has a lot more experience than you.  You can discuss things in confidence with a trusted mentor.  You should not expect your mentor to take action, however.  That would require your mentor to break the confidentiality inherent in the relationship, and that would be bad for all concerned.

    If your boss is generally invited to lots of meetings with people higher in the organization, you can bet his/her behavior is sanctioned and respected by higher-ups.  Unless the whole hierarchy is composed of bozos, you may find that your boss is behaving in a way that senior people honor and appreciate.  When that's the case, you need to examine your own standards, because the boss is behaving consistently with the values of the larger organization.

    Another tip-off:  Your boss asks for lots of feedback from others on the team and acts on that information.  Yet another:  You notice your boss is reading lots of related periodicals and books, or attends lots of educational courses trying to learn how to manage better.  Good managers never assume they know everything they need to know.  Even CEOs of multi-billion dollar enterprises seek out advice and try to learn how to do their jobs better.

    Another clue:  Does your boss take time to teach other people how to do their jobs better?  If you notice others learning but you're not being exposed to those opportunities you need to ask yourself:  "What am I doing that keeps me out of the loop?"  Ask some of those more favored people what they notice about you and your relationship to your boss that you could improve.  Approach your boss, in all humility (see "The Virtue of Ignorance," in , August, 2002) and ask questions about how you could be doing a better job.  A good, smart boss will help you; a bad one will discount you for seeking advice.

    Remember, your lack of experience may reveal that you don't yet really understand the important things that bosses, managers and supervisors have to do.


Your Boss Might Be A Total Jerk

    Yes, it's possible.  Sometimes people get promoted to a level that exposes their incompetence.  Such people often don't know they're incompetent, and they're frustrated that they can't move higher in the organization.  They're stuck, and so are you.

    Your boss might be a better politician than manager, doing whatever it takes to keep superiors pleased and sucking up to every senior person.  You can tell the hard-core politicians:  They shift with the winds, their beliefs change from time-to-time, they can be exquisitely sensitive to changes in the corporate culture.  If there are changes higher up and your boss switches from one way of operating (e.g., treating people with respect) to another (e.g., treating people with disdain), you can be sure you're working for a politician.  There's nothing inherently wrong with being a politician...unless it's the only thing the boss does well.

    Bad bosses often overestimate their own knowledge relative to what they need to know to do well.  They ignore opportunities to learn, dismiss ideas from more junior members of the team, cut off discussions, and avoid exposure to new concepts.

    In these cases, you may or may not be able to do anything to improve the situation.  The first step is to keep your head down, do what you're told, and stick it out while you gather more information.  If you discover you're working for a boss in a dead-end job, it may be time to find another opportunity:  If you like the company, be on the lookout for other positions; if not, it's time to seek opportunities elsewhere.  You can't change the incompetent or politically-motivated manager, and you'll only get punished if you try.  Keep your opinions to yourself, or you may leave behind a bad reputation.

    Once you've accurately identified this boss as someone who's unlikely to change and for whom you cannot continue to work, the one thing you don't want to do is to go "over their head."  Talking to the boss' manager will usually destroy your own credibility, challenge that senior person's judgment, and word will get back to your boss which can only make matters worse.  If you've decided this is an untenable situation, find an honorable way out.  
Once you've decided to move on, keep it to yourself until it's official.

You can only hurt your reputation by making announcements before you've made all your arrangements.


Your Boss May Be Inexperienced

    It's a fact of life:  Many people that are really good at a job will get promoted to the next level, where they have little or no experience.  And, in most cases, corporations don't take much responsibility for preparing people for these new challenges.  It's "sink or swim."  If the new boss swims, they get to keep the job; if they sink, higher management may (or may not) find a more suitable person for the job.

    If your boss really is smarter than you thought, or is a total jerk, you know what to do.  If your boss wants to do better, but doesn't know how, you can actually help your boss become better at the job.  It's time to practice everything you've learned about collaboration.

    You can help your boss do better by asking questions:  When you're given another dirty assignment you hate, try to find out why:  "I seem to get assignments like this from you often; is there some reason why?"  If your honest question is rebuffed, or treated with disdain, you've probably sorted this person into the "jerk" category.  If your boss gives you a good, understandable explanation you're probably dealing with a good boss.  But, if your boss sits down with you to discuss your perceptions, you're probably dealing with someone who wants to do better.  By asking a question that expresses your honest concerns, you can decide whether this relationship is salvageable or not.

    You can ask questions of your co-workers, too:  "I seem to be having trouble with the boss; can you help me understand what's going on?"  You may receive some specific counsel that you can use.

    The trick is to negotiate, never demand:  By asking questions, you expose your interests and concerns without being offensive or confrontational.  In the process of that ongoing dialog (keep asking those questions!), you may discover this is a boss who's really pretty good, a total jerk...or someone who wants to find ways to work with you better.


Who's Perfect?

    It's likely that no boss is exclusively in one of these three categories.  We're all human:  Sometimes we're sinners, sometimes saints.  If all your evidence clearly categorizes your boss exclusively into one category, check your assumptions with other people you trust.  But, when the preponderance of evidence puts your boss into one of these categories, you have the information you need to act.

    For more ideas, see "The Insider:  Creativity's Delicate Dance," in the issue of September, 2002.  Take the time to gather data from peers, mentors, that boss, and then check your data with trusted peers and mentors.  Done carefully, you may learn something, your boss may learn something or—best of all—you may both learn how to be more productive...together.


This article was originally published in the newsletter, November, 2002
and is available to our subscribers on our website, http://www.net-working.com.

 
Home       Subscribe       Archives       Community       Contact Us       Current Issue       Free Newsletter

© 2002, Deep Woods Technology, Inc.